Lauren just turned four last Sunday and over the weekend Orion turned 2 1/2. Age probably doesn’t mean much right now but Lauren says she’s ready to be bigger so she can do more things independently and Orion keeps reminding us not to call him baby. It’s strange since most of the time I have to hold him as he whines and acts like a little baby with a large vocabulary who is also fully potty-trained. It confuses the heck out of me. The girls weren’t as affectionate at 2 1/2. Although I want to cherish our time together, there are times when I need Orion to act his age (and walk) so I can get a few things done around here.
Last night he spent his first night in his big boy bed. He looked so cute all tucked in under his truck and car themed blankets, but the empty crib tugged at my heart strings so much I had to look away. This is a milestone for Orion (middle name, Xavier) who also says do not call him Ox for short anymore. I should be happy. Believe me I want to have peaceful rest and for him to get up in the morning without putting us all on blast because he can’t get out of his crib to go potty. And the new bed may not even solve that problem since he pees standing up and needs a stool to reach the toilet. Aww, who am I kidding? He’ll figure out how to fly solo by the fall, if that long. He’s a pretty fast learner.
Meanwhile, I have my two baby girls back. Both vying for attention and needing to be held and cuddled as well. I have to prepare myself because Lauren (and Orion too) will go to preschool in the fall and Lainey starts kindergarten. I’m excited for some free time in which to write, but don’t want to feel like I’m rushing them out of the house — even though it’s time for them to go. I’m a basket of mixed emotions. Don’t know how much to expect them to do or what to hold back from them at times.
I don’t know why I’m trippin’. I shouldn’t even be at this point. A couple of years ago I was doing great just mothering by instinct then gradually I became worried I wasn’t doing enough. Now I think it’s time for me to go back to my basics. Using my instinct works and that way I don’t over think how to manage them. Cause I’m just like any other millenium mom, “I don’t want to mess them up.” I pray that prayer often, “God please don’t let me mess them up.”
I am richly blessed to have time to spend with my children and then turn around and blog about it. So I may as well keep enjoying my cuddle/baby time with each one of them and not feel guilty at all. Life could change in an instant with school and work and I’d be longing for these days. The simple plan is to make sure they are developing appropriately for their ages without me being to hard or too soft. I’m sure the terrfic three will help me figure it out!